Friday, April 23, 2010

How to Be a Yenta, Part 1

1) The first step to being a Yenta, is admitting that you're a Yenta.
There's nothing wrong with that.

2) I suggest living on a street where all the houses are close together.
Preferably in a small town.

3) Stop and say hi to all your neighbors... "Hi Heather!"
In fact, say hi to everyone who you pass on the street.
Then when you travel into the big city, or other towns and cities,
it will shock you how many people do NOT say hello.

4) Take surveillance pictures whenever you can.

5) Write down all the facts in your journal. (or blog)

6) Become friends with the people at your local hardware store.

7) Hang out at the local Hair Salon or Barber Shop.
These people know EVERYTHING about everybody.
(And they often have free coffee & baked goods.)
This is Ilene. Between the two of us, we rule this town.

8) Get involved. In as many dramas as you can.

9) Lastly, teach your children how to be Yentas.
This one is here to take over for me when I'm gone.

Good luck, everyone!


pve design said...

kvetch, kvetch, kvetch!
You are the Yenta with fab tips for all!!

G-Ro said...

My landlady has that taken care of for now, but when I buy my own house... Thanks for the tip. :)

Magpie said...

I want those sneakers.

Peculiar Whimsy said...

You're the best!

Nadine @ BDG said...

I am so incognito throughout my town (well, as much as I can blend) that I may need more Yenta instruction--

modernemama said...

roddeltantes rule!

Janet said...

I wish I lived in that kind of neighborhood :-)

Elena said...

Oy vey.